school's well..very school-like now. it's operating like one in a clock-work manner. which of course sucks to it's very essence. another sh*t thing about it now is how i don't get to see many of my friends from Mistral, since we're all separated into different classes and courses. we all end at different times and since we're all stuck in different classrooms during tutorials, we don't get to bump into each other like before. it just sucks.

i feel the same feeling i had in MacPherson now. the very weird, lost feeling where i would just don't care about school work [i don't even open my school bag until the next day in school], i don't pay attention in class and i just feel really really miserable in school. the 'for no reason' kind of miserable. i don't have any interest in the subjects i'm studying, particularly Biology. it's now so much more Chemistry-like and unlike the Biology i studied in Secondary School. and maybe it's due to the fact that the lecturers and tutors aren't as interesting and engaging as Ms Han. the lecturer for SURE is as boring as hell. i feel like falling asleep everytime i see her. my tutor is alright, she's a new teacher but there's just something lacking and she doesn't help much in helping me take interest in bio the way i did in MacPherson. maybe i just have to give myself a good kick in the ass to wake up. at least my Chinese tutor is interesting. he's a funny dude and his lesson is really interesting. instead of reading texts and sh*t like that, we learn about proverbs and such. he's very laid-back and that helps as i feel that Chinese teachers who are too firm or rigid tend to make me lose interest in Chinese. my GP tutor is another citizen of boresville. she just looks uninteresting to begin with. her lessons lack pace and depth but then again what do you teach in GP? my Math tutor disturbs me. he's just weird. his method of teaching is weird, he talks weird, he looks weird, he acts weird. my classmates were making fun of how gay and dorky he his. i just don't feel comfortable in his class. he does the half-hearted job of never fully explaining a question or fully guiding us when doing a problem. he would do it half way and not explain how to go on with it. it just leaves me lost. maybe it's just me.

i don't see how my classmates are so spurred on to do their work. they get all excited about finishing this tutorial or that tutorial. i don't even know which tutorial we're at now. my apathy perplexes me. maybe i'm just too subconsciously anxious and worried about my 'O' Level results.

feel. not good now. don't know why. just feel like sh*t again. for nothing feel like sh*t. ah, whatever.

Werd. get better, get good, let's rock like how we should.

"it's hard to say..."